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最終更新日 : 2012/01/29 (Sun) 09:42
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最終更新日 : 2012/01/29 (Sun) 09:42
最終更新日 : 2012/01/29 (Sun) 09:42
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It is better to be quotable than to be honest.
When the rich think about the poor, they have poor ideas.
Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to take away.
Outside of a dog, a book is man\'s best friend. Inside of a dog, it\'s too dark to read.
Lohr\'s Law: The future is merely the past with a twist ? and better tools.
I\'m fed up to the ears with old men dreaming up wars for young men to die in.
You have a cough? Go home tonight, eat a whole box of Ex-Lax -- tomorrow you\'ll be afraid to cough.
Not only is there no God, but you try getting a plumber at weekends.
It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating.
Military glory -- that attractive rainbow, that rises in showers of blood -- that serpent\'s eye, that charms to destroy...
Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called \'Ego\'.
I\'ve just learned about his illness. Let\'s hope it\'s nothing trivial.
A fast word about oral contraception. I asked a girl to go to bed with me, she said \'no\'.
Wit makes its own welcome and levels all distinctions.
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.
Beware of computer programmers that carry screwdrivers.
Heav\'n hath no rage like love to hatred turn\'d, Nor Hell a fury, like a woman scorn\'d.
Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish.
I\'m fed up to the ears with old men dreaming up wars for young men to die in.
We\'ve all heard that a million monkeys banging on a million typewriters will eventually reproduce the entire works of Shakespeare. Now, thanks to the Internet, we know this is not true.
I\'d stop eating chocolate, but I\'m no quitter.
O\'Toole\'s Corollary of Finagle\'s Law: The perversity of the Universe tends towards a maximum.
Victory goes to the player who makes the next-to-last mistake.
Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedies.
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Far too many development shops are run by fools who succeed despite their many failings.
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The longer I live the more I see that I am never wrong about anything, and that all the pains that I have so humbly taken to verify my notions have only wasted my time.
Let him who takes the Plunge remember to return it by Tuesday.
Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers.
Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal.
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It is practically imposible to teach good programming to students that have had a prior exposure to BASIC: as potential programmers they are mentally mutilated beyond hope of regeneration.
Democracy is where you can say what you think even if you don\'t think.
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In this war ? as in others ? I am less interested in honoring the dead than in preventing the dead.
I invented the term Object-Oriented, and I can tell you I did not have C++ in mind.
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Being on the tightrope is living; everything else is waiting.
I took a course in speed reading and was able to read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It\'s about Russia.
If there?s one thing I know it?s God does love a good joke.
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It is the job of thinking people not to be on the side of the executioners.
It\'s the liberal bias. The press is liberally biased to the right.
Is it not a strange blindness on our part to teach publicly the techniques of warfare and to reward with medals those who prove to be the most adroit killers?
If FORTRAN has been called an infantile disorder, then PL/I must be classified as a fatal disease.
Why do grandparents and grandchildren get along so well? They have the same enemy -- the mother.
To err is human -- and to blame it on a computer is even more so.
Of all the enemies to public liberty, war is perhaps the most to be dreaded because it comprises and develops the germ of every other.
ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI?!
USA Today has come out with a new survey: Apparently three out of four people make up 75 percent of the population.
I don\'t even butter my bread; I consider that cooking.
When I am working on a problem I never think about beauty. I only think about how to solve the problem. But when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong.
My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn\'t take it out of my garden.
Only a free and unrestrained press can effectively expose deception in government.
Ever notice when you blow in a dog\'s face he gets mad at you, but when you take him in a car he sticks his head out the window?
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Ever notice that anyone going slower than you is an idiot, but anyone going faster is a maniac?
Our children are not born to hate, they are raised to hate.
2 + 2 = 5, for extremely large values of 2.
I don\'t know why we are here, but I\'m pretty sure that it is not in order to enjoy ourselves.
When you\'ve seen one non-sequitur, the price of tea in China.
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The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense.
There\'s many a bestseller that could have been prevented by a good teacher.
Opportunities multiply as they are seized.
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A people that values its privileges above its principles soon loses both.
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The best way to predict the future is to invent it.
Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws.
Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped.
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Man has no right to kill his brother. It is no excuse that he does so in uniform: he only adds the infamy of servitude to the crime of murder.
The truth is more important than the facts.
The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears, for there\'s no risk of accident for someone who\'s dead.
The shepherd always tries to persuade the sheep that their interests and his own are the same.
Testing proves the presence, not the absence, of bugs.
\'Everything you say is boring and incomprehensible\', she said, \'but that alone doesn\'t make it true.\'
An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered; an adventure is an inconvenience rightly considered.
A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.
First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.
Ever notice when you blow in a dog\'s face he gets mad at you, but when you take him in a car he sticks his head out the window?
In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it\'s the exact opposite.
Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called \'Ego\'.
God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time.
I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use.
The only way to combat criminals is by not voting for them.
There are some experiences in life which should not be demanded twice from any man, and one of them is listening to the Brahms Requiem.
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Oh for pity\'s sake. HERE. Two pebbles. Two more pebbles. FOUR pebbles. What is WRONG with you people?
It was the experience of mystery -- even if mixed with fear -- that engendered religion.
Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called \'Ego\'.
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Opportunities multiply as they are seized.
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Emulate your heros, but don\'t carry it too far. Especially if they are dead.
The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears, for there\'s no risk of accident for someone who\'s dead.
The backbone of surprise is fusing speed with secrecy.
Anyone who considers arithmetical methods of producing random digits is, of course, in a state of sin.
A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship.
It\'s impossible to experience one\'s death objectively and still carry a tune.
If you take something apart and put it back together again enough times, you will eventually have enough parts left over to build a second one.
I just bought a Mac to help me design the next Cray.
I\'m always amazed to hear of air crash victims so badly mutilated that they have to be identified by their dental records. What I can\'t understand is, if they don\'t know who you are, how do they know who your dentist is?
If I held you any closer I would be on the other side of you.
A picture is worth a thousand words (which is why it takes a thousand times longer to load...)
For if he like a madman lived, At least he like a wise one died.
The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think.
I\'m not going to get into the ring with Tolstoy.
In all large corporations, there is a pervasive fear that someone, somewhere is having fun with a computer on company time. Networks help alleviate that fear.
First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.
Man has no right to kill his brother. It is no excuse that he does so in uniform: he only adds the infamy of servitude to the crime of murder.
Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.
The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.
Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same reactions in the brain as marijuana. The researchers also discovered other similarities between the two but can\'t remember what they are.
Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.
Once you\'ve written TBicycle, you never forget how.
The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears, for there\'s no risk of accident for someone who\'s dead.
The study of non-linear physics is like the study of non-elephant biology.
The shepherd always tries to persuade the sheep that their interests and his own are the same.
The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his.
An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered; an adventure is an inconvenience rightly considered.
Before the war is ended, the war party assumes the divine right to denounce and silence all opposition to war as unpatriotic and cowardly.
Don\'t drive me crazy -- it\'s within walking distance.
Comedy is nothing more than tragedy deferred.
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I\'m not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. We are the president.
USA Today has come out with a new survey: Apparently three out of four people make up 75 percent of the population.
Ah, you know the type. They like to blame it all on the Jews or the Blacks, \'cause if they couldn\'t, they\'d have to wake up to the fact that life\'s one big, scary, glorious, complex and ultimately unfathomable crapshoot -- and the only reason THEY can\'t seem to keep up is they\'re a bunch of misfits and losers.
Biologically speaking, if something bites you it\'s more likely to be female.
Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen.
A sense of humor is part of the art of leadership, of getting along with people, of getting things done.
Getting an education was a bit like a communicable sexual disease. It made you unsuitable for a lot of jobs and then you had the urge to pass it on.
A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.
As nightfall does not come at once, neither does oppression. In both instances, there is a twilight when everything remains unchanged. And it is in such twilight that we all must be most aware of change in the air ? however slight ? lest we become unwitting victims of the darkness.
Our children are not born to hate, they are raised to hate.
Our government has kept us in a perpetual state of fear - kept us in a continuous stampede of patriotic fervor - with the cry of grave national emergency.
Everything secret degenerates, even the administration of justice.
If computers get too powerful, we can organize them into a committee -- that will do them in.
If it wasn\'t for lawyers, we wouldn\'t need them.
You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She\'s 97 today and we don\'t know where she is!
So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang up and he said \'You\'ve been promoted\'. And I swerved. And then he rang up a second time and said \'You\'ve been promoted again\'. And I swerved again. He rang up a third time and said \'You\'re managing director.\' And I went into a tree. And a policeman came up and said \'What happened to you?\' And I Said \'I careered off the road.\'
Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called \'Ego\'.
My opinions might have changed, but not the fact that I am right.
I heard someone tried the monkeys-on-typewriters bit trying for the plays of W. Shakespeare, but all they got was the collected works of Francis Bacon.
Future historians will be able to study at the Jimmy Carter Library, the Gerald Ford Library, the Ronald Reagan Library, and the Bill Clinton Adult Bookstore.
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What I am against is quotas. I am against hard quotas, quotas they basically delineate based upon whatever. However they delineate, quotas, I think, vulcanize society. So I don\'t know how that fits into what everybody else is saying, their relative positions, but that\'s my position.
What is morally wrong can never be advantageous, even when it enables you to make some gain that you believe to be to your advantage.
I have six locks on my door, all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three of them.
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I\'m not a member of any organized political party, I\'m a Democrat!
A man\'s only as old as the woman he feels.
Beware of bugs in the above code; I have only proven it correct, not tried it.
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The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think.
I\'d give my right arm to be ambidextrous.
Anyone who considers arithmetical methods of producing random digits is, of course, in a state of sin.
Tact is the ability to tell a man he has an open mind when he has a hole in his head.
Argue for your limitations, and sure enough they\'re yours.
The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.
[War] might be avoidable were more emphasis placed on the training to social interest, less on the attainment of egotistical grandeur.
If you take something apart and put it back together again enough times, you will eventually have enough parts left over to build a second one.
If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside.
There are two ways of constructing a software design; one way is to make it so simple that there are obviously no deficiencies, and the other way is to make it so complicated that there are no obvious deficiencies. The first method is far more difficult.
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One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one\'s work is terribly important.
To understand a man you should walk a mile in his shoes. If what he says still bothers you that\'s ok because you\'ll be a mile away from him and you\'ll have his shoes.
It\'s impossible to experience one\'s death objectively and still carry a tune.
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Every nation has its war party. It is not the party of democracy. It is the party of autocracy. It seeks to dominate absolutely.
Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.
The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds, and the pessimist fears this is true.
Where humor is concerned there are no standards - no one can say what is good or bad, although you can be sure that everyone will.
Dying is a very dull, dreary affair. And my advice to you is to have nothing whatever to do with it.
A man can\'t get rich if he takes proper care of his family.
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Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has not heart; and any man who is over 30, and is not a conservative, has no brains.
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I am not young enough to know everything.
One word sums up probably the responsibility of any Governor, and that one word is \'to be prepared\'.
In the begining there was nothing and God said \'Let there be light\', and there was still nothing but everybody could see it.
Computers can figure out all kinds of problems, except the things in the world that just don\'t add up.
If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside.
Behind every great fortune there is a crime.
The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his.
I\'d give my right arm to be ambidextrous.
A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.
Instead, I was a painter, and became Picasso.
Heaven is an American salary, a Chinese cook, an English house, and a Japanese wife. Hell is defined as having a Chinese salary, an English cook, a Japanese house, and an American wife.
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When his life was ruined, his family killed, his farm destroyed, Job knelt down on the ground and yelled up to the heavens, \'Why god? Why me?\' and the thundering voice of God answered, \'There\'s just something about you that pisses me off.\'
Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining.
A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.
Life would be so much easier if we could just see the source code.
Paramount among the responsibilities of a free press is the duty to prevent any part of the government from deceiving the people.
A scholar who cherishes the love of comfort is not fit to be deemed a scholar.
Thank you for sending me a copy of your book - I\'ll waste no time reading it.
An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered; an adventure is an inconvenience rightly considered.
Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it.
I don\'t care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.
I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use.
If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe.
University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.
The difference between \'involvement\' and \'commitment\' is like an eggs-and-ham breakfast: the chicken was \'involved\' - the pig was \'committed\'.
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Death does not concern us, because as long as we exist, death is not here. And when it does come, we no longer exist.
Comedy is nothing more than tragedy deferred.
In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.
It is practically imposible to teach good programming to students that have had a prior exposure to BASIC: as potential programmers they are mentally mutilated beyond hope of regeneration.
Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, \'Where have I gone wrong?\' Then a voice says to me, \'This is going to take more than one night.\'
It\'s clearly a budget. It\'s got a lot of numbers in it.
Incrementing C by 1 is not enough to make a good object-oriented language.
Men have become the tools of their tools.
The music business is a cruel and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free, and good men die like dogs. There\'s also a negative side
If the brain were so simple we could understand it, we would be so simple we couldn\'t.
If you are going through hell, keep going.
The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears, for there\'s no risk of accident for someone who\'s dead.
Nothing is wrong with California that a rise in the ocean level wouldn\'t cure.
Where humor is concerned there are no standards - no one can say what is good or bad, although you can be sure that everyone will.
Ah, you know the type. They like to blame it all on the Jews or the Blacks, \'cause if they couldn\'t, they\'d have to wake up to the fact that life\'s one big, scary, glorious, complex and ultimately unfathomable crapshoot -- and the only reason THEY can\'t seem to keep up is they\'re a bunch of misfits and losers.
I have often regretted my speech, never my silence.
I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them.
I\'m not going to get into the ring with Tolstoy.
Getting an education was a bit like a communicable sexual disease. It made you unsuitable for a lot of jobs and then you had the urge to pass it on.
Why was I with her? She reminds me of you. In fact, she reminds me more of you than you do!
We must all hear the universal call to like your neighbor like you like to be liked yourself.
A bird in the hand makes it hard to blow your nose.
I have seen the future and it is just like the present, only longer.
There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.
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What a cruel thing is war: to separate and destroy families and friends, and mar the purest joys and happiness God has granted us in this world; to fill our hearts with hatred instead of love for our neighbors, and to devastate the fair face of this beautiful world.
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I have yet to meet a C compiler that is more friendly and easier to use than eating soup with a knife.
Fill what\'s empty, empty what\'s full, and scratch where it itches.
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Argue for your limitations, and sure enough they\'re yours.
If absolute power corrupts absolutely, where does that leave God?
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Misunderstandings and neglect create more confusion in this world than trickery and malice. At any rate, the last two are certainly much less frequent.
The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other is ready.
Don\'t be so humble - you are not that great.
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Millions long for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon.
A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship.
A little inaccuracy sometimes saves a ton of explanation.
Why do grandparents and grandchildren get along so well? They have the same enemy -- the mother.
I\'m Jewish. I don\'t work out. If God had wanted us to bend over, He would have put diamonds on the floor.
All sorts of computer errors are now turning up. You\'d be surprised to know the number of doctors who claim they are treating pregnant men.
A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.
The music business is a cruel and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free, and good men die like dogs. There\'s also a negative side
Pray, v.: To ask that the laws of the universe be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.
If people can judge me on the company I keep, they would judge me with keeping really good company with Laura.
A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.
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Pascal /n./ A programming language named after a man who would turn over in his grave if he knew about it.
Everything has been figured out, except how to live.
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Once you\'ve written TBicycle, you never forget how.
Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped.
I once heard two ladies going on and on about the pains of childbirth and how men don\'t seem to know what real pain is. I asked if either of them ever got themselves caught in a zipper.
Barab疽i\'s Law of Programming: Program development ends when the program does what you expect it to do whether it is correct or not.
Military glory -- that attractive rainbow, that rises in showers of blood -- that serpent\'s eye, that charms to destroy...
So I rang up a local building firm, I said \'I want a skip outside my house.\' He said \'I\'m not stopping you.\'
Java: the elegant simplicity of C++ and the blazing speed of Smalltalk.
Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen.
All sorts of computer errors are now turning up. You\'d be surprised to know the number of doctors who claim they are treating pregnant men.
True. When your hammer is C++, everything begins to look like a thumb.
To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer.
I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them.
If FORTRAN has been called an infantile disorder, then PL/I must be classified as a fatal disease.
Sterling\'s Corollary to Clarke\'s Law: Any sufficiently advanced garbage is indistinguishable from magic.
If a man does his best, what else is there?
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The wit makes fun of other persons; the satirist makes fun of the world; the humorist makes fun of himself.
Because I do it with one small ship, I am called a terrorist. You do it with a whole fleet and are called an emperor.
Sex is like air. It\'s only a big deal if you can\'t get any.
Humor is the great thing, the saving thing. The minute it crops up, all our irritations and resentments slip away and a sunny spirit takes their place.
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I\'m all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let\'s start with typewriters.
It was God who made me so beautiful. If I weren\'t, then I\'d be a teacher.
We totally deny the allegations, and we are trying to identify the allegators.
Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I\'m not there, I go to work.
Programming is like sex: one mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called \'Ego\'.
There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.
Whether you think that you can, or that you can\'t, you are usually right.
Marry me and I\'ll never look at another horse!
If you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you.
C combines all the power of assembly language with the ease of use of assembly language
Maybe this world is another planet\'s Hell.
最終更新日 : 2012/01/15/(Sun) 21:46
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